Several months of not hearing from her obviously didn’t do him good. He didn’t really know how to handle himself after that, after all it was the first break up he had ever gone through. It wasn’t something he was used to, nor was it something that he had practice with. It had completely devastated him, whatever good falling in love did for him was the same amount of negativity he had to deal with when Kate left him. It had left a hole in his being, he had yet again felt unwanted, uncared for, and unloved. Back to normal I guess you could say, but this time around it’s a little bit more difficult. The yearning for love was already there, he already felt like he was missing something like he was incomplete without it. Sadly there was little he could do about it because Kate wouldn’t even pick up any of his calls, and the worst part about it is that he didn’t even know the reason for it. One of the many things that people find hard to handle during break-ups is not finding out why it happened. Closure is always important.
Now needless to say the boy’s friends weren’t oblivious of this. They knew that something was troubling him and they dealt with this the best way they could. They set him up with another girl by the name of “Anna”. Anna was great, she was nice, caring, friends with a bunch of his friends and well she was.. convenient. They got along well enough and she helped him ease the pain. But sadly Anna wasn’t Kate. But this boy knew nothing about love, knew nothing about what to do with it so since he knew that Anna liked him, he eventually started going out with her. Slowly Anna started making him feel whole again, but not as whole as Kate did because he knew that it just wasn’t the same. The hole that Kate left was still there, he didn’t know that he had to fill that up first by himself before he should let other people in.
And so a few days before Christmas, Anna was speaking to the boy over the phone. They had gotten into a relatively deep conversation about feelings and Anna had opened up to him and told him that she loved her. Thinking that he was already over Kate, the boy reciprocated and they decided that it’d be a great idea for them to be together. It was something new for him, it didn’t feel as magical as it did with Kate but he thought to himself, maybe it’ll grow over time. They said their goodbyes for that night and they put down the phone. Not a minute later the phone begins to ring, he picks it up and for a split-second his heart stops beating. It was a voice he hadn’t heard in a long time, a voice that he had missed dearly, a voice he had tried to forget over the past couple of months, a voice he completely didn’t expect to hear specially not a minute after he just got into a new relationship. It was Kate. She started off with a simple yet very straight to the point greeting “It’s Kate, how’ve you been? I missed you.” This made the boy’s heart jump right out and suddenly remember everything that he tried to cover up. Instantaneously a flood of emotions overcame the boy and he was just in shock. He couldn’t speak, and Kate noticed this. She started laughing and followed up with another question, “How’s your love life?” Then out of sheer panic and due to the sudden rush of emotions that overcame the boy had said something that until this day he regrets, his moment of sheer douche-baggery, the first time he ever became an asshole towards women and one of the biggest lies he’s ever had to live with. “It’s non-existent”.
He had told Kate that he wasn’t seeing anyone, wasn’t dating anyone, wasn’t in like or in love with anyone on the eve that he just got into a relationship with Anna. He had said so because he feared that Kate would disappear into the nether yet again like she did before. He completely disregarded the fact that he had just gotten into a commitment with Anna, and that she had done nothing to deserve such treatment. But the boy was in love still, and he didn’t know better. He didn’t even bother to correct himself with what he was saying that night, he stuck to it because he didn’t want to jeopardize the chance to rekindle whatever it was that he lost with Kate. Tonight he stepped into the world of being an asshole, being a liar and being selfish.
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