Yes the title pretty much says it all. For those of you who cannot handle cheese, this is it. Turn back now.
I know that stereotypically I'm not supposed to want cuddling up, spooning, curling up in bed with someone and watching dvds or something to that effect but sue me because that's what I miss the most.
The one thing I truly miss about being in a relationship with somebody is exactly that, the quality time. I'm not gonna be a hypocrite though and say that I didn't enjoy sex or whatever (yes that's an open admission that I'm not a virgin anymore, big whoop) but yeah, sappy as it may seem I really miss the quality time. I guess I sort of miss the routines of being in a relationship as well, things that seem like they're chores when you're in a relationship are the things that you miss when you're not in one. I don't fully understand why people are like that? Why do people only realize things they have when they're already gone. And even if you go through it again, chances are you'll get sick of it again and let it go. Rinse & repeat. Why is it so hard to condition the human mind into just being content? I know for a fact that this ambition, or this drive for something better has a good side to it because you'll constantly be on the lookout for something better, but is there a point where you can literally just tell your mind "Stop! I'm fine with this. No more hunting for better things"?
Contentment (Who by the way is friends with Expectations and Reality. They're like the mean girls/plastics of the Word World.) is such a bitch to find, always hiding, always making you think that you've got it already then once you have it in your hands all of a sudden it slips off into nothingness. Then you're back to square one.
I know that ambition is a powerful driving force, but is there a way to contain it only to certain aspects of life? I mean don't get me wrong, it's not like I wanna settle down already or anything, but maybe I just want somebody I can call on whenever I've got good news, or bad news, or any news for that matter. Maybe I just want somebody to be there for me, in the same way that I would be there for her. Maybe I just want someone who I can hold for however long I want to hold where it wont feel awkward and you don't have to politely back down. Maybe I just want to see someone smile at me not just because you haven't seen each other in a while, or because you said something funny but because they're just truly happy to see you. Maybe a part of me wants someone to go home to, or to go home for. They say Sagittariuses are free spirits, they say that we thrive on freedom and we're sucky at relationships.
They may have been right about the latter part, but I highly disagree with the former.
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Aww. =( *hugs*
ReplyDeleteSobrang Cheesyyyy!!!though the wise said that you can only be contented right beside the person you truly love.
ReplyDeletehey! are you alright? another sad blog? this is Yeye by the way. how's Fran? drop by sana ako ulit one of these days sa station just to hang out, hope that's alright! :D
ReplyDeleteok, about your entry:
it's my first time to hear a man say something like this. i like it. it's honest, refreshing and nakakakilig. seriously, the woman for you, whoever she is, will be a lucky one. im pretty sure she wouldn't mind getting hugged by you kahit isang oras pa yan! haha. :)
on a serious note,if there's anything i've learned, we are only sucky at things we do not value. for those that we do, we strive to make better each day. so when you do meet your one, im sure you won't be sucky at the relationship because you just want to give it your all - because it's worth everything to you.
on wanting quality time, i actually agree with you. if there's anything i miss about being in a relationship, it's going home each day with all these stories in my head and i just couldn't wait to share it with that person. i really loved the silent embraces where you just sit on the couch together and listen to each other's heartbeat. there's a sense of quiet contentment in that gesture of love; to just hold each other's hand while you watch TV or even eat takeout while you exchange meaningful smiles in the dining table, or the happy feeling you get just at the knowledge that the one you love is coming over to visit, spend time with you, hug you, kiss you and wrap his/her arms around you. i can go on and on, but the short version is, i get you. i get the longing. i get the feeling. and i want to feel that feeling again, but this time with the right man.
we can only hope that the person for us comes along soon. that way we can pour that overflowing love in our hearts to them and that the yearning will be fulfilled - and hopefully, contentment follows.
maybe patience is key? we want things now, but in reality we're still not ready? so we just wait i suppose. and pray that soon, everything will fall into place. :)
@wackyye yeah I remember you ye :) you gave fran and I snickers and I "picked you up" on air :) haha. and regarding your response. DAMN! I just woke up and that really just drilled my head with an influx of memories of the past. and yeah I guess I see your point. But it just sucks to have to wait around, and I guess I'm just scared that I might have to wait around for a long time. It's something I really don't want to have to go through you know?
ReplyDeleteHAHA! yeah, you did "pick me up" on air! that was super funny! :D
ReplyDeletei guess you can think of the waiting as a period to "perfect" yourself, to make yourself better and more whole each day. that way, when you meet the one, you are more than ready to share the whole Gino with her. :)
a friend once told me, you cannot expect to build a life with someone if you haven't even invested in your own life as a foundation. so get to know you - develop, learn, grow, progress, improve (what other synonyms are there? hehe.)! move towards the super Gino that you want to be.
but i get you. the whole concept of waiting SUCKS! we hear the word "waiting" and we might have a picture of someone sitting down in a corner literally waiting for life to handover one's love. so let's change perspective then? let's see "waiting" as an opportunity to just live life - make new memories, learn new things, go places, meet people. that way it doesn't feel like waiting is "waiting".
and before you know it, SHE'S knocking on your door, wondering where you've been all her life. wouldn't that be nice? :D
I agree Gino. Of all the hardships a person had to face none was more punishing than the simple act of waiting. It sucks, It's something I really don't want to have to go through too, but it's not like I even have a choice. But just like what wackyye said "we can only hope that the person for us comes along soon." People say waiting is a way to test your faith and patience but don't they realize that life is too short though patience is a virtue still time is gold.
ReplyDeletethere's nothing sappy about admitting the truth...smile!
ReplyDeleteLogically, you cant give to someone if you dont have it. First of all, Loving is giving half of yourself. So basically, how can you give even a part of yourself when you know for a fact that you are not whole as a person. in short, youre not complete. I totally agree with wackkye develop, LEARN and most especially G-R-O-W. Maybe waiting is too hard for you when you havent really moved on from your past. You need to be happy with yourself first. That is the very reason why when you are together with someone, you still seemed not contented and after you let it go, there comes the regret which is a very awful feeling.
ReplyDeleteremember that you cannot give what you dont have. You cannot love not unless you love yourself.
haha.. i bet ul have the Valentine syndrome soon come Feb.1.. iinom mo na lang yan Ginoboi..haha..Merry Christmas!! .. lilipas din ang panahon and ul soon find new opportunities
ReplyDeletesame comment, I share the same sentiment... I'm bad at being single too :( agh!
ReplyDelete